RIP iPod Classic… after 3 months

I knew Steve Jobs was a dickwad (especially after telling that journalism student to fuck off), but holy jeebus this is intolerable!

I’ve been a loyal iPod user since the 2nd gen Nano came out (my first MP3 player was the San Disk 250 MB- a red one), and made the upgrades to the iPod 120 GB and then, in September, the 160 GB “Classic” (every little cheap shit something is dubbed classic these days- the new business buzzword after “passion”). It serves me right for being blinded by Pixar’s epicness and breaking on the iPad to find out that it has a moving parts hard drive and not a flash drive like the 120. I mean I only dropped the 120 a billion times and it still played music and displayed my pics like no tomorrow (but the video was fucked to hell I’ll admit).

You should really read the well-rounded reviews before making a major electronics purchase.

Last Friday was your typical winter’s New York City day, icy as fuck with wind that ripped your ears clear off. And as I rode the bus home I had on my favorite You Tube junk playing on the Classic to block out the junior high hellcats squealing over Justin Gayber- or whatever- but no problems with the Classic. Why would I have any problems with a too-big-to-fail company’s product? Well that night as I tucked myself under my 8 blankets to stave off the bitter cold I was ready to laugh myself to sleep to AVP when, lo and behold, the screen stayed black.

I checked the hold button. Not in the orange position. I hooked it up to my Wii. Still dead. The next morning I tried getting it up on the PC. No such luck. Then I went to Amazon ready to email customer service, when I decided to see what the less than satisfied Apple customers had to say. And golly gee, their problems seemed to be a lot like mine. Dead within a couple of months because gol ole Steve can’t make a flash drive to withstand the “beating” of average use to accommodate 160 gigs (minus overhead)- and I have Speck armor on my shit 24/7! But according to my fellow saps, you’ll get the royal treatment of disdain from the Twifuckers who work the counters at the Apple store before handing over your free replacement.

Life is good.

Merry Xmas, Happy Hanukkah, Happy Ramadan, Happy Kwanzaa, and Happy Shut The Fuck Up and see you all in 2011!


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